Aziz Ansari Quotes

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Do It Under the Influence Yourself! That's what we're shooting for! Get drunk and make your dreams come true. -Aziz Ansari
do-it-under-the-influence-yourself-thats-what-were-shooting-for-get-drunk-and-make-your-dreams-come-true
I like going out and I like being single, but a growing part of me would rather just stay home, cook food with someone I really like, and do nothing. -Aziz Ansari
i-like-going-out-i-like-being-single-but-growing-part-me-would-rather-just-stay-home-cook-food-with-someone-i-really-like-do-nothing-aziz-ansari
I'm an optimist - I feel like an amazing part of life is that at any moment. -Aziz Ansari
im-optimist-i-feel-like-amazing-part-life-is-that-at-any-moment-aziz-ansari
For the majority of the time, I may as well have been just a really tan white kid. You know, I may as well have just been, like, a fat kid. -Aziz Ansari
for-majority-time-i-may-as-well-have-been-just-really-tan-white-kid-you-know-i-may-as-well-have-just-been-like-fat-kid-aziz-ansari
I have never taken the high road, but I tell other people to 'cause then there's more room for me on the low road. -Aziz Ansari
i-have-never-taken-high-road-but-i-tell-other-people-to-cause-then-theres-more-room-for-me-on-low-road-aziz-ansari
I live in L.A., I go on tour all the time, I'm in New York half the year - it's very hard to be in a relationship. -Aziz Ansari
i-live-in-la-i-go-on-tour-all-time-im-in-new-york-half-year-its-hard-to-be-in-relationship-aziz-ansari
Yeah, I've been a little down. Totally natural. I'm getting a divorce, but now I'm ready to pull myself up by some G-strings. -Aziz Ansari
yeah-ive-been-little-down-totally-natural-im-getting-divorce-but-now-im-ready-to-pull-myself-up-by-some-gstrings-aziz-ansari
One of the big things I miss about New York is not my friends so much; it's Shake Shack, the burger place. I miss Shake Shack. -Aziz Ansari
one-big-things-i-miss-about-new-york-is-not-my-friends-much-its-shake-shack-burger-place-i-miss-shake-shack-aziz-ansari
It's the hardest thing to come up with an hour of material that can consistently keep people laughing. -Aziz Ansari
its-hardest-thing-to-come-up-with-hour-material-that-can-consistently-keep-people-laughing-aziz-ansari
The most influential thing was the two Chris Rock specials that came out when I was in high school. I was obsessed with that stuff. -Aziz Ansari
the-most-influential-thing-was-two-chris-rock-specials-that-came-out-when-i-was-in-high-school-i-was-obsessed-with-that-stuff-aziz-ansari
It's much more fun to share and laugh at the bad times and the frustrations. I find you get a much deeper connection with the audience that way. -Aziz Ansari
its-much-more-fun-to-share-laugh-at-bad-times-frustrations-i-find-you-get-much-deeper-connection-with-audience-that-way-aziz-ansari
If you look up feminist in the dictionary, it just means someone who believes men and women have equal rights... -Aziz Ansari
if-you-look-up-feminist-in-dictionary-it-just-means-someone-who-believes-men-women-have-equal-rights-aziz-ansari
You should really treat stand-up like you would a play. It's a one-man play. -Aziz Ansari
you-should-really-treat-standup-like-you-would-play-its-oneman-play-aziz-ansari
Stand-up comedy is a raunchy profession. -Aziz Ansari
standup-comedy-is-raunchy-profession-aziz-ansari
The four sweetest words in the English language
the-four-sweetest-words-in-english-language-you-wore-me-down-aziz-ansari
Even in my stand-up, there's a lot more positivity and enthusiasm rather than negative, I-hate-everything vibes. -Aziz Ansari
even-in-my-standup-theres-lot-more-positivity-enthusiasm-rather-than-negative-ihateeverything-vibes-aziz-ansari
What's cool about Twitter is that you can make a joke about something very of-the-moment or random that I wouldn't be able to joke about in stand-up. -Aziz Ansari
whats-cool-about-twitter-is-that-you-can-make-joke-about-something-moment-random-that-i-wouldnt-be-able-to-joke-about-in-standup-aziz-ansari
Why would anyone get married and have babies? That's the dumbest idea I've ever heard in my life. Or the scariest thing I've ever heard in my life. -Aziz Ansari
why-would-anyone-get-married-have-babies-thats-dumbest-idea-ive-ever-heard-in-my-life-or-scariest-thing-ive-ever-heard-in-my-life-aziz-ansari
If your job was remotely interesting, there would be a show on A&E about it. -Aziz Ansari
if-your-job-was-remotely-interesting-there-would-be-show-on-aampe-about-it-aziz-ansari
Most people would say 'the deets', but I say 'the tails'. Just another example of innovation. -Aziz Ansari
most-people-would-say-deets-but-i-say-tails-just-another-example-innovation-aziz-ansari
When you meet someone you really like and connect with, I think that's very special, and not to be taken for granted. -Aziz Ansari
when-you-meet-someone-you-really-like-connect-with-i-think-thats-special-not-to-be-taken-for-granted-aziz-ansari
Let's have a moment of silence for all the chubby Asian dudes that are getting 'Gangnam style!' yelled at them by bros around the world. -Aziz Ansari
lets-have-moment-silence-for-all-chubby-asian-dudes-that-are-getting-gangnam-style-yelled-at-them-by-bros-around-world-aziz-ansari
I've always tried to maintain that I don't have any advice to give. I'm a curious observer. -Aziz Ansari
ive-always-tried-to-maintain-that-i-dont-have-any-advice-to-give-im-curious-observer-aziz-ansari
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