I was never really certain why he scared the bejesus out of me. Nothing scared me growing up. I've been playing with dead people since the day I was born, so it's good thing, yet the Big Bad scared me. Which brings me to the reason I called." "Which was to give me nightmares for the rest of my life?" "Oh, no, that's just a plus. Why was I so scared of him?" "Hon, for one thing he was this powerful, massive, black smokelike being." "So, you're saying I'm a racist?
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There is a fine line between love and hate, or haven't you heard? Sometimes it's hard to decipher exactly which emotion is strongest." I raised my chin. "I don't love you either." He lowered his head and watched me from underneath his dark lashes. "Are you certain? Because the emotion pouring out of you every time I'm near you is certainly not disinterest." "That doesn't mean it's love." "It could be, I promise you. Take off that sweater and give me ten minutes, and you'll believe beyond a shadow of a doubt you're in love.
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Writing is transcendental. It is a form of expression, a form of art that you can take anywhere. That you can do anywhere. It poses the deepest questions in the universe. It generates emotion. It elicits empathy, promotes learning, creates an intellect you simply cannot get from any other medium. For me, it is air.
Every night in my dreams, a man appeared from the darkest recesses of my mind, as if he'd been waiting for me to fall asleep. His mouth, full, masculine, would sear my flesh. His tongue, like flames across my skin, would send tiny sparks quaking through my body. Then he would dip south, and the heavens would open and a chorus singing hallelujah would ring out in perfect harmony.
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So, where are you from?" Agent Carson asked Reyes. "Originally?" I whirled around to face him again, this time pinning him with a warning glare. Carson was an FBI agent, but I was all about stealth. Surely she wouldn't pick up on my silent threat. He studied my mouth, not the least bit worried about my warning glare, then said at last, "Here and there." I relaxed against the seatback. He didn't say hell. Thank God he didn't say hell. It was always hard to explain to friends how, exactly, one's fiance was born and raised in the eternal flames of damnation. How his father was, in fact, public enemy number one. And how he escaped from hell and was born on earth as a human to be with his true love. As romantic as it all sounded, it was difficult to articulate without garnering a visit from men with butterfly nets.
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How old are you, anyway?" "How old are you?" "Seventeen." I raise a brow. "Almost. I'll be seventeen in two weeks. You?" Part of me doesn't want to tell her. She'll be horrified. But part of me wants to know what she will do when she knows the truth. "How old do you think I am?" She lifts a slender shoulder. "At first I thought maybe eighteen, but now I'm thinking at least nineteen. Maybe even twenty?" "why's that?" "You seem very... experienced." I nod. "You're close. Today's my birthday. I'm thirteen.
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I also become the local computer nerd. The administration brings me in to fix all the computers, I create viruses to invade at a specific day and time. They call me in, and I eradicate my own virus, only to plant another one to go into effect a couple months later. They ask me why I can't just fix the computers once and for all. I tell them to quit going to porn sites and it will stay fixed. That shuts them up every time.
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We get heroes with impossible abilities and heroines with strengths we can only dream of. And for a little while, we are those characters. That hero is in love with us. That heroine is you, the reader, and you are all kinds of powerful. And you might even, given the right circumstances, save the world.
You still owe me a million dollars." I'd presented him with a bill for proving his innocence and getting him freed from prison. He had yet to pay. Couldn't imagine why. "Yeah, I was hoping we could work that out." "The interest alone is going to kill you." "What do you charge?" "Three hundred eighty-seven percent." "Is that ethical?" "It's as ethical as my dating the son of Satan.
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The next thing I remembered was Reyes smiling down at me as the sun filtered into his apartment, his hair mussed, his lids hooded with the thick remnants of sleep. I stretched as those three little words that every girl longs to hear slipped from his mouth with effortless ease. As though they did every day. As though they didn't mean the world to me. With one corner of his mouth tipping sensually, he asked, "Want some coffee?" And I fell. I fell hard.
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Bye-bye. Nice knowing you. But if you are waiting for that perfect idea to strike like lightning during a dust storm (I live in New Mexico), you could be waiting a long time. Ideas are everywhere. EVERYWHERE. I can't walk to the bathroom without being hit with another idea. It's what you DO with that idea that matters. Here is your mantra: BICHOK, BICHOK, BICHOK Translation: Butt in chair, hands on keys. Just write. Every stinking day.
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Real writers write. Period. No, the muse does not come to visit everyday. She's a lazy, precocious flirt. You cannot get into the habit of being 'in the mood' to write. No writer on Earth is in the mood to write everyday, but the good ones do it anyway. They fight through their fatigue, their stress, their doubt, and they write. They get the words on the page. Period. So stop waiting for your muse. Trust me, she sleeps around.
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Writing doesn't get any easier with time or talent. If writing is easy for you, you're probably still learning the craft. You haven't perfected your style or landed upon your 'voice.' You haven't learned to analyze your writing with a critical eye, to rip it apart and figure out why it isn't doing exactly what you want.
No writing is effortless. I'm not saying you can't have a good day where the words just kind of flow, but even those words have to be edited. Probably more than once. And I'm not saying a character hasn't somehow gone in a different direction that I wanted her to go, but that was me, not her. I let her get away from me. I let her roam free and nine times out of ten, the result is not good. I have to go back and start over because she veered off the path of my book. She changed the vision. And I did that. Not her.
Humor is so subjective, not everyone is going to get what you are peddling. Others will be offended when what you meant no offense whatsoever. Those are the stakes. You have to be able to stand up for yourself and what you've written. Comedy pushes limits, makes people uncomfortable, and is a natural reaction to the environment. Otherwise, as I said, it is forced. Let it flow and give your characters permission to cross a line or two, but only if you can take the heat afterward.
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Step back and scrutinize your work, to delve deep into the meaning behind the words, it will get both easier in some ways and harder in others. Either way, you need to practice everyday. You will probably get faster with time, because you learn to do this instinctively, and the writing may flow better on some days more than others, but it doesn't get easier. And if you aren't writing everyday, you are doing yourself and your craft a disservice. Writing is a habit. Get into the habit.
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Amador and Bianca have a great life that I'm only a little jealous of. They have two kids they bring to see me. His daughter, Ashlee, is almost five now. She has asked me to marry her when I get out. It feels kind of weird since she calls me Uncle Reyes and incest is frowned upon, but who am I to argue with true love?
I know what kind of man it takes to get involved with something as barbarous as human trafficking.' 'I get it, Swopes. He's not the kind of man you take home to meet your stepmom.' I rethought that. 'Wait a minute. Maybe my stepmom would like to meet him. Do you think he ships to Istanbul?
Did you catch the time-of-great-suffering thing?' Her expression softened. 'Can you just make sure I'm not around when it happens?' 'No can do, ' I said, strolling back to my office with a negating wave of my hand. 'If I have to suffer, then so does everyone else within a ten-mile radius.' She pursed her lips. 'What ever happened to taking one for the team?' 'Was never much of a team player.' 'Sacrificing yourself for the greater good?' 'Not that into human sacrifice.' 'Suffering in silence?' I stopped and turned back to her, my eyes narrowing accusingly. 'If I have to suffer, I'll be screaming your name at the top of my lungs the whole time. You'll be able to hear me all the way to Jersey, mark my words.' - Charley to Cookie
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Since I didn't have a candy wrapper to help me with the bad connection I was about to have, I resorted to using vocal sound effects. When Agent Carson picked up, I started my performance. "Agent... Agent Carson, " I said, panting into the phone. "Yes, Charley." She seemed unimpressed, but I wasn't about to stop now. "I-I know who the kshshshshshsh are." "I'm a little busy right now, Davidson. What is a Ksh, and why do I care?" "I'm sorry. My kshshsh... is kshshsh... ing." I repeat. What is a Ksh? And why do I care if it is ksh-ing?" She was a tough one. I knew I should have waited and bought a Butterfinger at the Jug-N-Chug. Those wrappers crakled like Rice Krispies on a Saturday morning. "You aren't listeni-kshshsh." "You're really bad at this." "Bank ro-ksh-ers. I know who they kshshsh." "Charley, if you don't cut this crap out." I hung up and turned off my phone before she could figure out what I was trying not to tell her and call back.
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Gemma Davidson, ' she answered, her voice as groggy as I felt. 'Where are you?' I asked. 'Who is this?' 'Elvis.' 'What time is it?' 'Hammer time?' 'Charley.' 'Did you text me? Did your car break down?' 'No and no. Why are you doing this to me?' She was funny. 'Check your cell.' I heard a loud, sleepy sigh, some rustling of sheets, then, 'It won't come on.' 'Not at all?' 'No. What did you do to it?' 'I ate it for breakfast. Check the battery compartment.' 'Where the hell is that?' 'Um, behind the battery door.' 'Are you punking me?' I heard her fumbling with the phone. 'Gem, if I was going to punk you, I wouldn't simply turn off your phone. I would pour honey in your hair while you slept. Or, you know, something like that.' 'That was you?' she asked, appalled.
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Wow, ' Sussman said, 'you look hot even with the slight disfigurement.' I stopped and turned toward him. 'What did you say?' 'Um, you look hot?' 'Let me ask you something, ' I said, easing closer. He took a wary step back. 'When you were alive, like, five minutes ago, would you have told some chick you'd just met that she looked hot?' He thought about that a moment, then answered, 'No. My wife would divorce me.' 'Then why is it the moment you guys die, you think you can say whatever you want to whomever you want?' He thought about that a moment, too. 'Because my wife can't hear me?' he offered.
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My fore-parts, as you so ineloquently put it, have names.' I pointed to my right breast. 'This is Danger.' Then my left. 'And this is Will Robinson. I would appreciate it if you addressed them accordingly.' After a long pause in which he took the time to blink several times, he asked, 'You named your breasts?' I turned my back to him with a shrug. 'I named my ovaries, too, but they don't get out as much.
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Ambulances were cool. 'You just want to fondle my extraneous body parts, ' I said to the EMT as I picked up a silver gadget that looked disturbingly like an alien orifice probe, broke it, then promptly put it back, hoping it wouldn't leave someone's life hanging in the balance because the EMT couldn't alien-probe his orifices.
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If Cameron kidnaps you, kills you, then buries your lifeless body in a shallow grave in the desert where your remains lay decomposing for several decades until they're accidentally discovered by some guy on a journey to awaken his spirit at the Salinas Pueblo Missions, can I have your iMac?" I gaped at her. "You've really thought this out. "I love your iMac." "I love my iMac too, and you're not getting her." "But you'll be decomposing.
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