In some aspects losing a child is like a wall, but instead of getting over it, you must carry the wall with you, wherever you go, for as long as you live. The wall is immovable. You can't go anywhere until you learn to move the wall. You are just stuck in the same place, forever. You can tug and tug all you want, there are days that the wall will not move. And there are days that it moves ever so slightly. Over time I have realized that in order to move forward, knowing that I must bring this wall with me, that the best way to do so is to metaphorically flood the soil near the wall with water, and have the wall float with me, instead of me having to carry it. Every act of love and kindness turns to water. Water and love can penetrate and move anything. It just takes time. I need to turn my wall into a raft.
-John A. Passaro
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APAJohn A. Passaro Quotes. (n.d.). Jar of Quotes. Retrieved , from JarofQuotes.com Web site: https://www.jarofquotes.com/view.php?id=in-some-aspects-losing-child-is-like-wall-but-instead-getting-over-it-you-must-carry-wall-with-you-wherever-you-go-for-as-long-as-you-live-the-wall-is-immovable-you-cant-go-anywh
ChicagoJohn A. Passaro Quotes. Jar of Quotes, 2019. https://www.jarofquotes.com/view.php?id=in-some-aspects-losing-child-is-like-wall-but-instead-getting-over-it-you-must-carry-wall-with-you-wherever-you-go-for-as-long-as-you-live-the-wall-is-immovable-you-cant-go-anywh, accessed .
MLA"John A. Passaro Quotes." Jar of Quotes, 2019. . https://www.jarofquotes.com/view.php?id=in-some-aspects-losing-child-is-like-wall-but-instead-getting-over-it-you-must-carry-wall-with-you-wherever-you-go-for-as-long-as-you-live-the-wall-is-immovable-you-cant-go-anywh
If you had one last breath - what would you say? If you had one hour to use your limbs before you would lose the use of them forever - would you sit there on the coach? If you knew that you wouldn't see tomorrow who would you make amends with? If you knew you had only an hour left on this earth - what would be so pressing that you just had to do it, say it, or see it? Well there is something that I can guarantee - that one day you will have one day, one hour and one breath left. Just make sure that before that day that you have said, done and experienced everything that you dream of doing now. Do it now - that is what today is for. So pick up the phone and call an old friend that you have fallen out of touch with. Get out and run a mile and use your body and sweat. Seek out someone in your life to say your sorry to. Seek someone In your life that you need to thank. Seek someone in your life that you need to express your feelings of love to. Then when that day comes you will be ok with it all.
John A. Passaro
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Mr. Passaro, let me teach you about how medicine works.' He starts out. 'One of two things is going to happen. Either the Doctors are going to say I told you so, or they are going to say that Jess was the exception. What you believe will determine who gets to say I told you so to whom.' 'Never stop believing.' He begs me. 'Doctor, you are on the team'. I say. He smiles.
John A. Passaro
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There are a few things in life that occur, that you don't ask for, that are just dealt to you. These things can define you or you can define yourself through them. I elect to define myself through overcoming what has been dealt to me in my life. It took thirty-one years and two generations of tweaking to get my first perfect ending. Now I am going to work on my next one.
John A. Passaro
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There is an open circle.' This mantra is what my high school coaches would say to me during wrestling practice when they knew that I was physically exhausted and was about to rest for a moment. There was an open circle on the wrestling mat, and if I was interested I could get out there and do more. 'There is an open circle.' Meaning there is still more that you could do. Don't rest now; this is where the difference is made. To work when you are mentally and physically exhausted gets you to the next level. 'There is an open circle.
John A. Passaro
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There is something special about baseball that goes far deeper than being a game. It is the father-son relationship that is built, the life lessons that are taught in the process of playing a game and the ability to overcome not succeeding all of the time and still considering yourself a success.
John A. Passaro
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In a proud fatherly sadomasicisticly way, I am thrilled when I get hit. As every deep purple bruise on my body represented a perfect swing. If I were to lift my shirt at any time there would be 4-5 bruises on my body... As soon as I was able to, I would throw batting practice again from the short distance, and take another shot if necessary to keep the boys in the zone.
John A. Passaro
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Life is like a train ride. The passengers on the train are seemingly going to the same destination as you, but based on their belief in you or their belief that the train will get them to their desired destination they will stay on the ride or they will get off somewhere during the trip. People can and will get off at any stop. Just know that where people get off is more of an reflection on them, than it is on you. There will be a few people in your life that will make the whole trip with you, who believe in you, accept that you are human and that mistakes will be made along the way, and that you will get to your desired destination - together, no matter what. Be very grateful of these people. They are rare and when you find one, don't let go of them - ever. Be blessed for the ones who get on at the worst stops when no one is there. Remember those people, they are special. Always hold them dear to your heart. Be very wary of people sneaking on at certain stops when things are going good and acting like they have been there for the whole ride. For they will be the first to depart. There will be ones who secretly try to get off the ride and there will be those that very publicly will jump off. Don't pay any heed to the defectors. Pay heed to the passengers that are still on the trip. They are the important ones. If someone tries to get back on the train - don't be angry or hold a grudge, let them. Just see where they are around the next hard turn. If they are buckled in - accept them. If they are pulling the hand rail alarm again - then let them off the train freely and waste no space in your head for them again, ever. There will be times that the train will be moving slow, at almost a crawls pace. Appreciate that you can take in the view. There will be times where the train is going so fast that everything is a blur. Enjoy the sense of speed in your life, as it is exhilarating but unsustainable. There will also be the chance that the train derails. If that does happen, it will hurt, a lot, for a long time. But there will be people who will appear out of no where who will get you back on track. Those will be the people that will matter most in your life. Love them forever. For you can never repay these people. The thing is, that even if you could repay them, they wouldn't accept it anyway. Just pay it forward. Eventually your train will get to its final stop and you will need to deboard. At that time you will realize that life is about the journey AND the destination. Know and have faith that at the end of your ride your train will have the right passengers on board and all the passengers that were on board at one time or another were there for a distinct purpose. Enjoy the ride.
John A. Passaro
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It has taken me four years to figure this out. If we live long enough, we all will experience this. Don't ever predetermine how you think that you should feel on an anniversary of a tragic event in your life, such as a death of a loved one, or on a holiday after such an event. Each year starts out with 365 days, and I will be damned if I am giving up even one of them to misery.
John A. Passaro
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There is a club in this world that you do not join knowingly. One day you are just a member. It is 'The life changing events club.' The fee to join the club is hurt beyond belief, payable in full, up front for a lifetime membership. The benefit of the club is a new found perspective on life, and a deep understanding that you may not be happy about your current situation, but you can be happy in your current situation. The only rule to the club is that you cannot tell anyone that you are a member. The club does not provide a directory of its members, but when you look into a member's eye, you can tell that they too are part of the club. Members are allowed to exchange that brief eye contact that says: 'I didn't know.' Being a member of this club is the last thing that anyone initially wants in their life. Being a member of this club is the best thing that ever happens to a person in their life, and there is not a person in the club that would ever give up their membership. If you really look and know what you are looking for you can spot the clubs members; they are the ones that provide a random act of kindness and do something for someone who can never repay them for what they have done. They are the people spreading joy and optimism and lifting people's spirits even when their own heart has been broken. I have paid my dues; my lifetime membership arrived today, not by mail, but by a deep inner feeling that I cannot describe. It is the best club that I never wanted to be part of. But I am glad that I am a member.
John A. Passaro
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I need to dream. I need to believe. I need to know that I have some control in my life. That if I work hard, that I will be rewarded. That life is not arbitrary. I need to believe that bad things happen to good people, for a greater reason. That dedication, sacrifice, hard work, discipline are all worthy attributes that will eventually produce extraordinary results. That if I live a certain lifestyle, that my family will be better for that. That there is a direct link between my actions and my results. That If I prepare properly that I can face the insurmountable foe and look him in the eye and say 'Bring it on, I can take whatever you can dish out.' I need to keep living in order to save my daughter from dying.
John A. Passaro
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There is a very good organization called "Make a Wish Foundation" that helps make a dying child's wishes come true. People go out of their way and work together to create an unbelievable lasting memory for a deserving person. What just dawned on me was: Why do we wait until someone is dying in order to do that? We have the opportunity to do this everyday for many, many, many people over our lifetime. It doesn't have to be a really big wish, small wishes add up fast. Imagine how much better the world would be if we all granted each other small wishes that came true every day. Find someone today and implement the "Make a Wish" concept in your life. Watch what happens.
John A. Passaro
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When you decide that you are going to do whatever it takes for as long as it takes, sometime during your seemingly infinite journey the weathervane will just change direction and the new winds of positive change will blow at your back instead of into your face and things will just get easier and you will start to see progress right out of the blue. When that day happens you will know that it is just a matter of time. And time is what I have.
John A. Passaro
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